The period of Adolescence is when the first part of the major brain formation takes place. Nature is preparing them for independence as an adult. It is fear & anxiety that manifests as craziness or stubbornness. It makes them less childlike and more adultlike in making their own decisions and sticking to them. They are becoming much more focused on their peers than their parents for what to do, what to believe. Another reason is that their parents are still treating them like children, not adults in progression, and they hate that with passion.
It is important that we are knowledgeable of this important biochemical reaction happening in their bodies. We see the physical manifestation of this as stubbornness and in their body shapes as subtle changes start to emerge with no prior notice. This has become a theme for teens. You begin to question the things you have been taught to believe. One reason is that your brain is getting more mature by the year (though it will not be complete until you are 25 or so). You are getting tired of being told what to do, and often not why. You are getting better adapted to your environment, so you are developing skills of your own.
The key to this changing situation is love (shower them with love) and prior knowledge of this transitional state would go a long way in reducing the intensity of their anxieties. Use your adult knowledge and cajole them as you explain the issues to them. In the end, they will believe differently, but probably never admit it to you. Their brains are extremely malleable during this period thus, here is an opportunity to instill some moral values in their thinking process. Actions speak louder than words. Always demonstrate or expose your principles in your interactions with the adolescents. Inculcate your morals through demonstration and actions. There will always be peers' pressure on them counteracting what parents and teachers are advocating. This is normal so an overbearing parent might inadvertently exacerbate the situation. By and large, their morality is heavily influenced by what they see at home than from external sources (peers, school, and their environment).
Fabian N. Ukaegbu was born in Eastern Nigeria. He received his basic education there before travelling to the United Kingdom for further education. He qualified in Marketing, Management, Accountancy and International Relations/Diplomacy. He worked for six and the half years as a Consular Officer in the Nigeria High Commission in London and has worked also as a finance officer for 14 years with the London Borough of Hackney.
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